Thrive Relationship Coaching

Posts Tagged ‘Personal Growth

I have a withhold.  I have made the successful transition to being vegan for about 2 years now, but I have been holding back from saying much about it here.  After I read about the realities of food production in the world, I was passionately determined to not participate in factory farming.  It was Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer that initially motivated me to make the decision to stop supporting the meat and dairy industry. I was so appalled at what I learned!  I had never before been ready to face into the reality of where my food was coming from with my eyes wide open. Friends and family have asked if it was my bout with breast cancer that influenced my decision to be vegan.  I don’t have a conscious knowing that this was what ignited my interest, but I am aware that I had just completed my treatment around the same time that I chose to read Eating Animals.  What I know is that I felt an impulse and curiosity that I was very drawn to follow. What’s matters is that I listened to what I really wanted and followed my desire to learn about and ‘try on’ being vegan.  I’m so glad I followed my impulse.  I felt (and still feel!) such a delicious whole body yes decision to be vegan, for my health, the animals(WARNING: GRAPHIC AND DIFFICULT TO WATCH) and the environment.

I haven’t written much about this here because I thought you would judge me.  (Yeah, so?) Think of me as radical! (I am!) And then of course, I would cry.  Smile!  You wouldn’t trust me to be your coach if you knew.  After all, vegans are those weird, hippie people who just eat granola and sprouts, right?  Bigger Smile!   Being vegan has given me another opportunity to be a very tall and proud sunflower in beautiful bloom.  I delight in fully owning my authority, my authorship of my life, which now includes caring about animals such that I don’t want to contribute to their suffering or violent deaths.  I choose to eat consciously to support my best health and my best energy.  I choose to care about the my environmental footprint and do my part to make it smaller.

 Why does conscious living equal being vegan for me?   I am so clear I am living in integrity, doing the right thing, taking right action, for me.  I feel deeply aligned with my values of nonviolence, living in awareness and taking 100% responsibility for the life I am choosing to live.  I also feel loving, accepting and respectful of every person’s right to choose what they eat.  (Of course, I always wish they would eat less meat!) Most every vegan used to eat animal products at some point in his or her life.  Being vegan is about compassion and education and advocacy, not about making judgments.

Being vegan has also opened up a new avenue for me to express my creativity.  I savor the joy of  writing, coaching and vegan cooking.  I continue to educate myself about living and eating compassionately.  I feel so grateful for all the vegan bloggers and activists in the world who teach me so much everyday and motivate me to do more to make the world a kinder, smarter and more aware place.  If this leaves you with any desire to explore veganism and lean in that direction, check this out.

Ahhhh.  The joy of fully revealing!

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those that matter don’t mind.”  Dr. Seuss


I sat down to meditate this morning.  I am fairly new at this practice and am only setting aside 15 minutes every morning to be still and check in with ME.  It’s not always something I look forward to, I still have that feeling of  nudging myself into it.  So this particular morning I sat down and noticed a pain in my neck and an ache in my back.  I focused on my breathing and attempted to send loving breath to those areas of my body.  I noticed I wanted a certain outcome….I wanted the pain to go away.  Yep, there’s my ole’ controlling persona at work again.  I wondered about the pain and my “Outcome Controller” persona.  I realized I have been in that mode a lot over the last few days with my daughter in my attempts to “get her ready” for college in the fall.   I thought to myself, “whatever happens will be okay”.  As soon as I thought this, I noticed a peacefulness seep through my body.  “Whatever happens will be okay.”  More flow and relaxing, peaceful energy running through me.  My neck and back pain was gone. Ahhhh…..this is why I meditate.  As I allowed myself to wonder, I became aware that I attempt to control the outcome because I feel afraid.  Afraid that if she doesn’t do A, then B won’t happen, then for sure C will happen… get the drift.  When I shifted into  trust with “whatever happens will be okay”,  I also let go of my delusional thinking that I can know or predict the future.  Oh yeah, that.  Again.  SMILE.

The title is borrowed from a wonderful song by Anne Heaton.  Check it out, she’s wonderful!

Whenever I remember, I set an intention for all my learning to be friendly.   May I be open to life’s feedback when it is a soft touch or a gentle nudge as opposed to needing to be hit with a metaphorical sledgehammer before I finally get what is going on right in front of me and right within me.   May I be willing to face the truth of what I am creating in my life while it is still a tiny champagne bubble and not a tsunami like disaster.  My intention is to meet life moment to moment with an openness for learning whatever I most need to learn with nonjudgmental loving presence. And to have fun while learning.

I invite you to set an intention for all your learning to be friendly, too.  Try it and see if you can feel your heart be even more open and loving to all the feedback that comes your way.

You might say believing there are no mistakes is just a rationalization. But in all sincerity, can you know for absolute certainty that something was supposed to happen one way and not another? In the moment, you might be convinced something was a mistake. Or you might think so in retrospect. You certainly might strongly wish that IT had happened differently.
How does thinking that something was supposed to happen differently than it did help you, or anyone else? Usually, it just makes you feel crummy, helpless, or resentful.  After all, it’s over and done with.
But….if you get used to thinking that there are no mistakes, and that there is something to learn from whatever happens, you will feel empowered and easefully centered with whatever happens.
Remember you get to choose your perspective. Choose openness to learning and you will flow with whatever life brings.

What have you been thinking of as a mistake, something you believe shouldn’t have happened the way it did,  that you could instead ask the questions: “What can I learn from this?” and “What do I most need or want to learn from this?”

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